#6 is really hot! What a sexy guy!
On Tue, Feb 28, 2012 at 6:01 PM, Jake West <jakewest_tn@yahoo.com> wrote:
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Diet & Fitness:
By John H. Sklare, Ed.D / February 27, 2012
The sixth and final most common issue that leads to dieting failure is Secondary Gain. How does this interfere with your ability to diet, lose weight and control eating?
This issue identifies people who hold a deep belief that there are good reasons not to lose weight. In fact, they believe that there are benefits to remaining overweight.
If you're one of these people, it's easy to understand why you've been unable to succeed at weight loss! It's almost as if you have two different personalities struggling for control inside your head.
There's the part of you that wants to eat better, feel better, lose weight, and do the right thing nutritionally.
Then there is this other part of you that doesn't seem to care about what you weigh or eat or how you feel. That part constantly makes excuses that result in diet failure.
Secondary Gain is the most psychologically serious issue and, as a result, it may be the most interesting of the six Inner Diet scales.
It's also the issue that appears to affect the least number of people, according to my research with The Inner Diet Questionnaire. It shows that only about 5% of those who are overweight have this problem.
I strongly believe that this number is larger than 5%, and my experience tells me that there are two primarily reasons why it doesn't show up more often.First, secondary gain is more often than not an unconscious issue. Since the origins of this issue are often repressed, many who struggle with this are simply not aware that this is a problem.
Second, many others are aware, but, as a coping mechanism, simply deny its existence.
Here's an example of conscious secondary gain with a young woman who was at a presentation I conducted a while back. I had just completed my explanation of Secondary Gain, when she said to me, You know, my roommate needs to hear this. I think she has a Secondary Gain problem.
I asked her to explain, and this is what she told me:
Her roommate, an aspiring actress, was overweight. She studied hard to learn the craft, but every time an audition came up, the roommate would always say that she was too heavy for the part.
No matter how much encouragement the woman gave her roommate, she would never go to auditions.
"I'll bet that she is using her weight as an excuse to avoid auditioning, so that she won't have to deal with the disappointment should she not get the part!" the young woman at the presentation told me.
I never met her roommate, so I don't know if that's true. But this scenario is an excellent example of Secondary Gain. If true, her roommate had an underlying motivation to remain overweight.An example of unconscious secondary gain that I have heard all too often involves adults who have been sexually abused as children. They often use their weight as a safety mechanism, holding on to the misguided belief that being overweight will make them less attractive to the opposite sex and thus help them avoid dealing with painful issues such as intimacy and sexuality.
This is often an unconscious issue for these people, because they may have repressed this very traumatic and devastating memory. People with sexual abuse in their past often benefit greatly from including professional counseling in their dieting and weight-loss program.
Please tune in for Part 8 next time, where I'll summarize my thoughts about this emotional eating series.Take Action:
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Former US President and Former GA Gov. Jimmy Carter felt that TROY DAVIS should not be executed and deserved a re-trial. The Former Director of the FBI felt that TROY DAVIS Was Not Guilty! Do not drive through Goergia as it is dangerous. Do not fly via Atlanta. For your safety -Do not travel to GA. TELL YOUR COMPANY NOT TO PARTICIPATE IN A CONVENTION IN GA! "Georgia Executes Innocent People!"And Now, Our War of the Fittest!
This group is called "Peckers Pics." The English - slang definition of "pecker" is to pluck at the truth. Therefore, we peck at items such as Gay Men's Health, Male Fitness, Gay (LGBT) Politics & Issues. In this section you may peck at each photo in order to decide the winner of the "war of the fittest!" Whereas, you should select the "Male Athlete" that may inspire you to exercise and "get fit!" Warning: This may stoke you!Your participation in discussion of health / news articles - appearing in this message is greatly appreciated.1
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You Decide!Société de Sainte Anne, Mardi Gras 2012;New Orleans / Feb 21, 2012Stoked?Société de Sainte Anne, Mardi Gras 2012;New Orleans / Feb 21, 2012Marine, partner reflect on gay kiss seen around the globe: 'The world went away for a few minutes'BY STEVE ROTHAUS / Miami Herald / Feb 28, 2012
A kiss is just a kiss unless you're a couple of strapping hunks and one is a U.S. Marine coming home from war to his male partner.Then a Facebook photo of the big smooch goes viral and becomes a news event covered around the world.
Marine Sgt. Brandon Morgan returned Feb. 22 from Afghanistan to Hawaii and jumped into partner Dalan Wells' arms. (Morgan is 5-feet 11-inches tall; Wells is 6-foot-6.)
A friend, David Lewis, photographed the family reunion.
"With all that was going on, we didn't even know he was there taking pictures," Morgan says. "The world went away for a few minutes."Morgan later posted the homecoming photos on his personal Facebook page and a friend then reposted the pictures on the Gay Marines page.
Within hours Sunday, the main photo had thousands of views and had been reposted on countless other pages. News stories ran worldwide. As of Tuesday, it had about 37,000 Facebook "likes" and nearly 9,000 comments.
"I can only imagine that it went viral because we were the first men to kiss," Morgan says. Shortly after the U.S. military ended it's gay ban late last year, two female Navy petty officers publicly kissed at a Virginia homecoming ceremony.
One of the couple's Facebook friends sent at critical message to Morgan's mother, driving her to tears.
"What did you do to mess up as a mother to make him do this?" read the comment.
Says Morgan, a Christian who grew up in Oakdale, Calif., near Modesto: "She loves me and my sister, who's a lesbian. She said, if you don't like my children and how I raised them, I don't care. My mother is awesome!"
Morgan, 25, and Wells, 38, have been a couple a short time and they've known each other a few years.
"I honestly knew I was in love with him from the first moment I met him," Morgan says, adding that before he came out he had made "a lot of mistakes," including marrying a woman.
During Morgan's six months in Afghanistan, "there was nonstop letter writing every day."
Wells, an oil painter in Oahu, says that when Morgan first asked him out, he said no.
"I didn't know how much he loved me and how much I was in love with him," Wells says.
The men say they plan to work with the gay military group Outserve.
Wells says he's not bothered by the sudden fame. "I'm a very shy person," Wells says. "If this helps one troubled teen and gives them hope for the future, if I can help, I will."Every gay and lesbian person who has been lucky enough to survive the turmoil of growing up is a survivor. Survivors always have an obligation to those who will face the same challenges."....JakeUrgent Notice: Our ObamaBiden2008 Group works hand - in - hand with Peckers PICS (Both groups were co-created to work with each-other). To prevent duplication of articles and questions, all members of this group are urgently recommended to join ObamaBiden2008 . We have the LGBT boycott list and discuss end of DADT, etc... There are 3 gay teen suicides in the USA - daily! There are Hate crimes against gay people. There are gay people who are fired over their sexual identity. There are gay people who died for our cause! These groups are focused towards Yahoo Members who sincerely care about LGBT rights and are interested in Gay Men's Health! Most important, we have a most critical election in 2012 that shall determine the future of LGBT rights and our health care (as many suffer from pre-existing illness)! Please Join Now!
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