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Health, Wellness, Exercise, Reflections:National HIV Testing Day: Why I got tested
Washington Post / By Rev. Aaron Graham / June 20, 2012
The author is a contributor to The Washington Post's local faith leader network.
As I walked into the Whitman-Walker Clinic I thought, What will everyone in the waiting room think when I tell the receptionist why I'm here? Will they think I'm gay? Will they think I cheated on my wife? I wonder if any of them know I'm a pastor?
As I went into the back room to get my finger pricked, I began to worry about whether I would test positive. What would my wife think? What would my church think? Would I lose my job?
While I know I would be loved by some, I also know I would probably feel judged by many. If one of my friends told me they were HIV positive I'm sad to admit that my first thought would be to wonder whether they were sleeping around.
I think it's this fear of being judged that prevents so many of us from getting tested.
When Jesus interacted with the sick, he always treated people with dignity and focused on healing rather than judgment. When the disciples asked Jesus why a certain kid was born blind, he replied, "Neither this man nor his parents sinned…but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him." (John 9:3; NIV)
I got tested because I believe Jesus would get tested. I got tested because, if Jesus were walking the streets of D.C. today I'm convinced he would be hanging out with those who are positive. Sick people always seem to find friendship and healing by being with Jesus.
One of the hardest moments of my life in pastoral ministry was when I had to bury a mother of four who had died from AIDS. This is not just something that happens in Southern Africa.
As of 2008, D.C. has the highest HIV rate in the nation at 3 percent, and it actually rivals many West African countries. How can we allow this to continue? It's obviously not enough to live in the capital of the richest country in human history or have access to some of the best hospitals in the world. It's going to take changing the culture.
Next month, our city has the honor of hosting the International AIDS Conference for the first time in the U.S. in over 20 years. I pray God would use this conference to help turn the tide on this epidemic locally by shining a spotlight on this injustice.
This is a preventable disease, but the first step to stopping the epidemic is for everyone to know their HIV status through testing. And the key to everyone getting tested is to remove the shame and stigma by modeling out a Jesus-like culture of grace.
June 27 is National HIV Testing Day. I hope you will go out and get tested. Let's all lead by example and break the stigma.
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- Boycott Bill O'Reilly and FOX News and their advertisers. Bill discussed a French commercial by McDonalds that was meant to show that McDonalds is Gay Friendly. Bill said what is next? Is McDonalds going to be Al-Quada friendly as well? Imagine - Bill O'Reilly compares Gays to Al-Quada! Further, Boycott Fox's Owner "Rupert Murcoch" and get him thrown in jail for illegal - political donations, bribery, hacking!
- Boycott Target, Best Buy, Gold's Gym - for donating money towards anti-gay political candidates/organizations. Update: (12/26/2010): Target is continuing to donate to anti-gay groups/causes/politicians. Update 03/08/11 - Lady Gaga Ends Target Partnership, Reportedly Over Target's Poor LGBT Stance. Update 3/25/2010 - Target displays their hypocrisy and Sues California Gay Rights Group for Lobbying Outside Stores. Target is attempting to block the LGBT right of free speech! STOP SHOPPING AT TARGET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Update 4/8/2011: Target lost its case to stop the LGBT from canvassing in front of their stores. A huge PR Disaster for TARGET! Perhaps Target should go out of business as they betrayed their investers and customer base. Target contributed massive funds to a politician who would like to exterminate gays. Now, Target can not stop us from Boycotting them, nor picketing, nor talking to customers near their stores; although, Target allows a anti-gay company such as the Salvation Army to stand outside their door and speak with customers and raise money. Isn't this a double standard?
- End DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act). Prevents Federal employees and Gays in the Military from gaining equal benefits. Prevents Gay Partners from gaining equal benefits.
- Pass a LGBT friendly ENDA (Employee Non-Discrimination Act). ENDA would prevent employment discrimination of LGBT workforce.
- Boycott Salvation Army as they will not hire Gays! "DO NOT DONATE TO THEM."
- BOYCOTT "Chick-fil-a" for donating money to anti-gay groups.
- BOYCOTT KOCH INDUSTRIES PRODUCTS- to include their products: Angel Soft toilet paper / Brawny paper towels / Dixie plates, bowls, napkins & cups / Mardi Gras napkins and towels / Quilted Northern toilet paper / Soft 'n Gentle toilet paper / Sparkle napkins / Vanity fair napkins / Zee napkins / Georgia-Pacific paper products & envelopes / All Georgia-Pacific lumber & building products (INVISTA Products) / Lycra / Stainmaster Carpet. The billionaire - Koch brothers are ultra republican - tea bag founders/supporters that do not support causes of the LGBT community.
- Boycott WALMART - The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force criticized Wal-Mart for denying employee benefits to same-s-x partners and for failing to prohibit discrimination based on gender identity. By comparison, the group said two other chain stores with a strong presence in New York, Costco and Walgreens, did much better.
- "Tune Out Trump", Boycott all Trump Hotel, casinos, holdings, The Apprentice and NBC Network! At CPAC, Trump said he is considering a run for president as a Republican. In a interview with the Des Moines Register, Trump added that he opposes all forms of legal recognition for gay couples, not just marriage. "They should not be able to marry," he said. So why does NBC keep the Apprentice when Donald Trump has stated he may run for president? After making racist remarks about Obama and recv'g public backlash, Trump decided not to run for president after NBC renewed his awful TV Show. How can NBC re-new the clown's show after he pulled such hateful shenanigans?
And Now, Our War of the Fittest!
This group is called "Peckers Pics." The English - slang definition of "pecker" is to pluck at the truth. Therefore, we peck at items such as Gay Men's Health, Male Fitness, Gay (LGBT) Politics & Issues. In this section you may peck at each photo in order to decide the winner of the "war of the fittest!" Whereas, you should select the "Male Athlete" that may inspire you to exercise and "get fit!" Warning: This may stoke you!
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Southern Maine Pride, Portland; June 16, 2012
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Southern Maine Pride, Portland; June 16, 2012
Should Not Disclosing Your HIV Status Be a Crime?
By Nicole Pasulka / Thu Jun. 21, 2012 / Mother Jones
Article with Map of States with Laws: http://www.motherjones.com/mojo/2012/06/criminal-transmission-hiv-law
In 2007, Donald Bogardus contracted HIV from his long-term partner. When he later had unprotected sex with a man who didn't know Bogardus was HIV positive, he was charged under an Iowa law that criminalizes the transmission of HIV.
"I wanted to tell him," Bogardus told the Daily Iowan, "but when I went to say it, I clammed up…I was afraid he was going to blab it out to everybody."
Now Bogardus--a church-going, nursing-home worker with cerebral palsy and a pet goldfish named Survivor--faces 25 years in prison and lifelong sex offender status. For many opponents of criminal HIV transmission statutes, who argue that they are ineffective at preventing transmission and stigmatize the HIV-positive, he's become the poster boy for the laws' severity.
According to the Center for HIV Law and Policy, 32 states and two US territories have some sort of HIV-specific criminal transmission statute. Forty-five states have laws against HIV-positive people not disclosing their status during sex, acts of prostitution, needle exchanges, or when making organ, blood, or semen donations, or have prosecuted people for these behaviors under general felony laws. In 13 of those states, there are laws against HIV-positive people spitting on or biting someone, neither of which has ever been proven to transmit HIV.
Twenty-one states have used general felony laws to prosecute HIV transmission, rather than statutes specifically criminalizing transmission. Beirne Roose-Snyder, managing attorney with the Center for HIV Law and Policy, argues that the common name for the statutes--criminal transmission laws--is inaccurate since none requires that transmission of HIV actually occur. Instead, the laws usually punish failure to disclose HIV-positive status to a sexual partner as intent to do bodily harm.
While comprehensive charging data is hard to come by, Roose-Snyder believes that over 400 HIV-positive people have been prosecuted with criminal transmission since 1990; a 2010 report from the center put the number at 350.
Iowa's 1998 criminal transmission law is one of the harshest in the country. Failing to disclose a HIV-positive status can bring a 25-year prison sentence and lifelong sex offender status. According to statistics from the Iowa Division of Criminal and Juvenile Justice Planning, 37 charges were brought under the law between 1999 and June 30, 2011. While 25 of the prosecutions were successful, only 15 people were convicted, since several people were targeted for more than one alleged violation.Iowa's law does not require that the sexual partner at risk of transmission actually contract the virus, and prosecutors have even won cases where a condom was used.
That's what happened to Nick Rhoades. Though he and Adam Plendl used a condom when they had sex, and Plendl didn't contract HIV, Rhoades was arrested and charged with criminal transmission of HIV. He plead guilty on the advice of his lawyer and was sentenced to 25 years in prison. On Thursday, Rhoades' new lawyers appealed to the Iowa Supreme Court arguing that the conviction should be overturned because he had used a condom. "The law only applies to those who intend to expose others to HIV," said Christopher Clark, an attorney for the LGBT rights group Lambda Legal, Rhoades' new legal representation, in a statement posted on the organization's website.Most of these state laws originated after the federal Ryan White Care Act of 1990. The law funded local and state HIV treatment and prevention programs, but only if states criminalized the intentional transmission of HIV. Many state laws created in response went further than the federal law required and defined "intentional transmission" as including not disclosing HIV-positive status to a sexual partner. In 2000, the act was reauthorized without the criminalization requirement, but state laws persist.
Though Roose-Snyder of the Center for HIV Law and Policy believes that the number of prosecutions under these statutes is increasing, there has also been a push to amend the nondisclosure laws. The Obama administration's 2010 AIDS initiative argued that the laws "may make people less willing to disclose their status by making people feel at even greater risk of discrimination." In September 2011, California Rep. Barbara Lee introduced the REPEAL Act, which would encourage states to repeal their criminalization laws. The bill argues that intentional transmission is rare; that criminalizing transmission "undermines the public health message that all people should practice behaviors that protect themselves and their partners from HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases"; and that the life expectancy of people with HIV has increased in the years since most of the laws were passed, so their severity does not reflect medical advances.
There has also been movement to modify the laws at the state level. A revised bill passed an Iowa Senate subcommittee in February and would treat transmission of HIV as a misdemeanor like hepatitis and tuberculosis. And most recently, in May both houses of the Illinois Legislature passed an amendment to their state's criminal transmission law that would exempt condom users. Gov. Pat Quinn is expected to sign it into law.
While opponents of criminal transmission laws in Illinois hail the bill as an improvement, they are critical of a provision that would amend the state's law and allow courts access to HIV test results to prosecute criminal transmission. The fear, legal advocate Owen Daniel-McCarter told the Chicago Phoenix, is that "[These new enforcement measures] may dissuade someone from getting tested because then there is no way to prove a crime."
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Broadway Bares: Fighting HIV/AIDS With 'Happy Endings' (And Yours Truly!)
Huffington Post / Lady Bunny / June 21, 2012
This past Sunday I gagged over Broadway Bares -- and I thought I'd lost my gag reflex long ago. But the dizzying spectacle/AIDS benefit, celebrating its 22nd year, broke its own fundraising records to raise $1,254,176. That brings the overall total to over $9.8 million since the event's humble beginnings at Splash Bar with seven dancers grinding for tips. This year's offering was called "Happy Endings" and featured burlesque routines based on fairy tales that knocked this ol' fairy's socks off. OK, make that my support hose.
I was a little surprised when I got a call to make a cameo in the show -- I'm more from the club world than the legitimate theater world, and take away my gay card, but I'm not the biggest theater queen. And because I like rough trade, I was curious to see how alluring the cast of strippers actually was. I'd imagined that if their "sexy" game face included jazz hands and the only thing erect was their precision "I'm on!" perky posture, it might be a little too corny for my taste. Boy, was I was wrong!
There were two dressing rooms for the featured entertainers, and they stuck me in the men's room. Before I had a chance to yell "that's transphobic!" my jaw dropped at the sight of the two men leading me, whose bits I'd get to ogle as they changed: droolworthy Kyle Dean Massey is looking for his prince charming, and he finds him in hunky John Carroll. Next door, in the real ladies' dressing room, were Miriam Shor (whom I didn't immediately recognize from Hedwig and the Angry Inch) and Jennifer Tilly. Miriam played the fairy godmother and nailed it with a dazzling winged costume, a perfect singing voice that's as clear as a bell, and impeccable comic timing. Jennifer camped it up as the wicked stepmother, and yes, she's just as charming in real life.
Because performers couldn't be seen before we went on, I couldn't see all of the show or give you a full synopsis. But I could hear the roar of the crowd backstage. They beat the walls over a creative conceptualization of Aladdin that just kept piling on the razzamatazz with amazing choreography, props, and gorgeous aerialists twirling above the audience in next to nothing. Thanks for putting me on right after the night's biggest hit! (The other most talked-about number went to the ladies for a saucy retelling of Puss in Boots whose soundtrack expertly blended Nancy Sinatra's "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'" with Beyoncé's "Run the World (Girls)."
With 30 genetic females, yours truly spoofed Rapunzel to the tune of Lady Gaga's "Hair" and Nicki Minaj's "Turn Me On." In a massive coiffure and brandishing a giant pair of scissors as a sort of Mama Rapunzel, I whacked off the dancers' long ponytails -- including one who pulled hers through her crotch. Did it make any sense? No, not really. Was it totally fun, impeccably staged and lit, and showing off lots of skin? Definitely! And that's all that mattered to the sold-out, cheering crowds. Every number received a standing ovation -- well, there weren't exactly any seats. But it isn't easy to keep a standing audience pumped up for an hour and a half.
The second show at midnight is always racier, and some of the strippers really let it all hang out. Yes, there are two shows for this one-off event, and let me tell you how hard these dancers work. They rehearse for weeks in advance, but on the big day they attend a rehearsal at 2:00 and then race to the matinées of the Broadway shows that employ them, then back to Roseland for a tech rehearsal at 5:00, then back to their jobs for the evening show, and then back to Broadway Bares for performances at 9:30 and 12:00 a.m. That's dedication! Not everyone can afford to donate to causes, but this cast and crew gave very generously of their time to create these magical scenes, as did everyone involved. Many of the volunteers who work behind the scenes return to help year after year -- and they gladly missed the entire show to man a snack table or check in with me to see if I needed anything, those two tasks being very closely related. Oink! But what really struck me was the sense of community that is often missing from other large gay events -- like the NYC Pride parade, which feels so corporate now that every other float is Verizon or Red Bull featuring straight go-go boys to hawk their wares to gays.
Although I must say, Broadway Bares not only schooled me on how erotic Broadway dancers can be but forced this lefty, liberal, power-to-the-people 99-percenter to acknowledge that -- it hurts to say it... choking a little here -- huge corporations aren't always bad. (Whew, I got that out!) The charitable spectacle couldn't happen without backers like M.A.C. Cosmetics, which has sponsored the event since its beginning and also donates makeup and a slew of makeup artists each year to make sure that all mugs are painted to perfection. You have to give credit where it's due -- to corporations that have the heart to wield their financial power to help those who need it, even if it's Broadway Bares' Mormon-owned sponsor Marriott, which (gnashing my teeth) also sponsored the defeat of Prop 8 in California. Oh, well, different causes, I suppose. There's gay marriage and there's AIDS, and then there's marital aids!
As a cast member, I received the same incredibly moving email that the whole cast got from Broadway Cares' executive director, Tom Viola. I'd love to reprint his letter in its entirety, but it basically reminded us that the reason for this light, sexy, and sparkling event is an ugly disease. We don't talk about AIDS anymore! It's too gloomy to fit in with our buff bodies and cocktail-oriented publications. We know how to prevent it, yet it keeps on spreading. So someone's not getting the message. Sadly, it's often our youth who didn't grow up seeing their friends waste away as my generation did, and who don't perceive AIDS as a death sentence because of new meds.
Tom and Broadway Bares, I applaud your courage to tell the truth no matter how tragic it is, and your passion to help correct the situation. He went on to share POZ's latest safe-sex guidelines and info about PEP, a new drug that can stop seroconversion if a slip-up happens during sex. Isn't that what gay pride is about: caring for our community? I see so much disdain for each other in the gay community based on who's a bottom, who's fat, who's femme, who's an old "troll," or whose HIV positive (wait, is this my Craig'slist personals ad?) that this caring vibe makes a super-refreshing change. I was so moved by Tom's words that I even cancelled the after-party I'd planned at my apartment, which I'd named Broadway Barebacks. Kidding!
The party's over for this year, but it's an annual event that you can either attend or view by purchasing the DVD. With a show this entertaining and sexy, it's a very fun way to care about your people. Personally, I was thrilled to be part of this show-stopping event with tons of heart.
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"June 27 is National HIV Testing Day. I hope you will go out and get tested. Let's all lead by example and break the stigma."
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